About Tami
My
Story
I grew up in fundamental Christianity and absorbed its teachings the first 25 years of my life. It was my whole identity. I checked off all the “righteousness boxes”: Pastor’s kid, mission trips, purity culture patron, Bible college and Evangelical Seminary graduate, married young to a Christian guy . . . Check, check, check.
I did everything right, but over time my faith that once offered security and hope began to strangle and confine me. When I could no longer tolerate being a woman in a world with so many responsibilities and so few opportunities, I began to crumble, fall, and deconstruct my faith - which was MY WHOLE IDENTITY. I’m not going to lie, it didn’t feel good. It impacted my relationships, my mental health took a hit, and my whole worldview changed. I EXPANDED. The growing pains hurt. What gradually unfolded was newfound openness, self-trust, my own confident voice, genuine love for ALL people, and a broader world of possibility.
For me, deconstruction was not a one time event in response to one major offense, it happened gradually over 10 years, undoing subtly harmful messages that I believed to my core.
Today, I live in the Pacific Northwest with my partner and three kids. I feel most alive when I’m among trees, open water swimming, snuggling my kids, or holding a paint brush. My own deconstruction journey has taught me that a fuller, freer life is possible.
My
Approach
The foundation: As a trauma informed coach, I know healing must start with safety. I am a naturally warm and inviting person. It is important that you trust me and I understand you. Additionally, I teach you practical skills so that you feel more comfortable and equipped to do uncomfortable work. We always go at your pace.
The healing: You may need to tell your story and let out emotions that were never allowed to be expressed. You may want to give voice to unthinkable experiences. When you land on "sticky" points, I help you move beyond words and into your body's stored memories. As you connect internally, I offer safe support as you “metabolize” pain, let go of what no longer serves you, and clarify your sense of self.
The integration: Lasting change takes time. I help you connect your healing to the real world of relationships, jobs, parenting, and living a lifestyle aligned with your values. I help you manage life stressors more efficiently and develop tools to be your own life coach.
I use Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Somatic Experiencing (SE) with my clients. Both approaches are experiential and take you beyond the realm of “thoughts” or “insights” and into your body. If you want more than just "talking it out," these approaches do just that. Sessions may offer reparative experiences that can help release whatever is holding you back inside.
Education &
Training
B.A. in Biblical Studies, Moody Bible Institute, 2009
M.A. in Counseling, Denver Seminary, 2013
15+ years of mental health counseling experience
5+ years of coaching folks with religious trauma
Extended trainings in IFS (Internal Family Systems), IFIO (IFS for couples), and SE (Somatic Experiencing).
*Note: While I have 6 years of Bible/Theology training, I no longer adhere to these teachings.
Let’s Work Together
Complete this form to set up a free 20 minute discovery call and determine if you'd like to work with me.
E-Mail: tami@tamiwidmertherapy.com
